Choosing to file for divorce, or learning that your partner has filed for divorce, can be a life-changing moment. Especially if your marriage has been of long duration, divorce can drastically change your family structure, lifestyle and finances. In addition, the divorce proceeding itself can be lengthy, contentious and stressful. As with any challenging ordeal, the work and forethought that you put into preparation can make an immense difference in the outcome.

To help your divorce case proceed as smoothly as possible, there are constructive steps that you can take in advance. These are recommended:

• Consult with a divorce attorney — A qualified divorce attorney can help you develop a checklist of items to consider and address so that you are in the best position to make the tough decisions about how to prioritize what you want in your divorce.
• Take stock of your property and income — In order to make the case for the property settlement you believe you deserve in the divorce, you need to itemize the assets owned individually or jointly by you and your spouse. Do the same for joint and individual debts. In addition, determine all sources of income earned by you and your spouse, including salaries, interest payments and investment dividends.
• Plan a post-divorce budget — Take some time to plan out what your financial situation will look like after the divorce. Determine what will be your likely ongoing expenses and what level of income you will need to cover them. Expenses like purchasing a new home or paying for a child’s education and healthcare are among the costs you should anticipate.
• Establish financial and personal independence — You should begin taking steps to separate yourself from your marriage. If all of your bank or credit accounts are joint, open a solo account and start depositing funds there. If you are not presently employed, begin job hunting. If your health insurance is through your husband’s policy, obtain your own coverage. If you’re concerned about mail inadvertently ending up with your spouse, open your own P.O. box. Even small steps like changing your emergency contact to another trusted family member can help to alleviate being overwhelmed down the road.

Equally important is not to take actions that will make divorce more combative. Don’t conceal assets or transfer them out of your spouse’s reach. If there are children of the marriage, don’t alienate them from their other parent or put them in the middle of arguments. Nor should you make spiteful or disparaging comments to or about your spouse, either in person or on social media.

At Harding, Harding & Harding Attorneys at Law in Virginia Beach, we have provided compassionate representation to Virginians in divorce proceedings for more than 30 years. To set up a free initial consultation at our Chesapeake office, call 757-499-2600 or contact us online.